Women and Attraction

  As human beings, we are attracted to others on a number of levels. I have felt myself emotionally, romantically, sexually, intellectually, spiritually, physically, socially and otherwise attracted to a range of individuals. For me to say I am “sexually” attracted to a woman does not mean what others might say it does. I have deep emotional connections to women.  These connections are safe and desirable because they are connections with other women. They are based on a common sex. A connecting conversation with another woman is fantastic! It nourishes and nurtures us both in healing and beautiful ways. I think...

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Recovery for me is…

The “Recovery is…” series will be continued with experiences and thoughts by both women who have struggled with addiction and women who have been impacted by a loved ones addiction. If you have a story to share or would like to contribute to this series, we have an open call for submissions under “contact”.   I’ve been thinking about the word and process of “recovery” lately. The Internet is full of good definitions, and I use other sources as well. This morning I discovered the following, while studying the word recovery. A quick Google search will tell you that recovery...

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Dealing with Shame

Shame is a part of all addictions. Shame is that deep sense of unworthiness we all feel sometimes. But as a woman in recovery from sexual addiction, my shame is sometimes overwhelming. After all, there are people who believe my addiction is a “man’s problem,” which makes me feel even more alone–isolated from those around me. If I believe this shame message, not only do I have to deal with having an unhealthy relationship with sex, but I also have to deal with being so different than “normal” women that my problem is seen as being something that only men deal with. It’s double isolating. When I let it, shame drives me into hiding. It keeps me from being connected to people I love, and who care about me.  I have to put up walls so people don’t get too close. I’m afraid that if they get close, they’ll see how broken I am and that they won’t love me anymore. When I was younger, I didn’t know what shame was. I had never heard of it. So every time I felt shame, I just believed that it was me. I believed whatever I felt. When I was a little girl, I learned to just be quiet. I didn’t have permission to share my feelings or to speak up. I didn’t realize I could actually argue or disagree with shame,...

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Welcome to Recovery for Women

Thank you for being here. We hope, above all else, that what is written here will give you hope. You are far from alone. So many women like you struggle with addictions to pornography, sex, and love. We hope to aid in the work of reducing shame for women who struggle, connecting women with each other through their stories, and helping women learn from one another about what works in recovery. If you are interested in sharing your story or writing articles for this site, please send an email to: Thank...

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